I remember shimmering skies and beautiful sunrises…

Many, many clouded visions…

Peaceful refuges from the storms of my mind…

The warm glow of morning at home…

But the early morning walk up to campus each day…

Including the Stanley Road Sleepers…

who would arrive well before first period, then camp out in their cars – blankets and pillows included.
There were also interesting signs…

And birds that were swift, as well as birds who were not so swift…

Plus my beloved perch, above all that surrounded me…

I went on excursions, among the trees…

There were also congested winter days…

Not to mention the wonders of winter…

And mountain adventures, which nearly left me stranded late one afternoon…

But I did get back down

How many people have ever followed the “Serving suggestion” they always seem to give on the food packaging?

(Part 1 written on 12^th January 2009; Part 2 written on 22^nd October 2009)

Before I forget,
Let me scribble down
The thoughts I wish to express –
Record for my own self
As a memory of this moment of my life.

Before I move on,
Let me remember the feeling
Of being submerged in the biggest part of my planet;
Wave after wave,
Gentle and rough,
Smoothly-contoured and wildly spread;
Jumping into,
Under,
Facing head on,
And turning my back;
Being moved by the never-ending forces of push and pull,
So vastly spread in oceans off every land mass in existence.

Shall I remember the outrage and mourning?
Of hundreds being massacred,
Each and every day
By an enemy whose heart is black,
Forever stained by the crimes they’ve committed against the innocent,
The innocent they wish to wipe out,
All for a small worldly gain.

Yet their arrogance in the earth
Will earn them all they deserve in Eternity,
If only they remembered –
If only they believed.

Shall I recall?
The memory of grandparents passed;
Layed to rest under lumps of soil,
Never to speak again in this world,
Yet their legacies live on
Through children now grown up,
With new generations following the established cycle of life:
From conception to birth,
Childhood to marriage,
Children to death,
And so it begins again.

Shall I spare a moment?
In thought of the seed I’ve planted,
The precious little one who now grows each day
In the womb of his/her first university;
The mother-to-be,
Whose pain I’ve not understood,
Whose frustration I can only hear about – but never feel.

Shall I stop to think?
Of the aspirations we have for our little bean,
How much we hope (s)he will live out the dreams we never could,
Contribute to this world the things we were not strong enough to;
For it seems our destiny was not to fulfill these bold ambitions –
But to lay the foundations for the next generation,
Who would start their journey much earlier than we,
And exhibit the nobility of character we ourselves could not attain.

- – -

Now that I’m back,
Let me continue
this hodgepodge of themes and thoughts,
and things that sit inside,
stifled by the busy-ness of life,
never finding their way into written expression.

Let me marvel
At the growing love that manifests itself before my very heart,
spending precious moments with the little soul that has been entrusted to my care.

Let me imagine
All that I want to do for her,
help her with,
protect her from,
teach and mould her to be.

Let me enjoy
the moments of the evening where she lays sprawled out on me,
tired from her day of playing, eating, fussing, and sleeping.

Let me express
my amazement at this miniature being,
who is now so utterly dependent on us,
yet in a few years
she’ll be doing her own thing,
perhaps – in innocence – making much mischief,
and needing near-constant supervision.

But before then,
can I stop to think of my own ambitions?
My own desire to use my abilities and passions
in ways that benefit others as well as myself.

Will I ever have the time?
To let loose that which is in me,
for a prolonged period,
Seeing my potential manifest before my eyes:
in words,
in images,
in conveyance of goodness from the depths of my being,
to the malleable hearts of those in search of direction.

Yet the guidance comes not from me,
but merely through me;
And maybe – just maybe -
someday I’ll find a larger stage to put forward amalgamations of
inspiration,
knowledge,
creativity, and
eloquence,
while still being cautious of the pride that could creep in and corrupt my intention,
thereby destroying my reward.

Before the thoughts run dry
Let me end here,
returning to my ‘normal’ life
of day to day, 7 to 4, routine action to routine action,
broken up by weekends.

But hoping to see – more constantly – the bigger picture:
that this life is not just an aimless Matrix,
but rather a means to a bright future -
which requires striving in the present,
a long wait until the end,
and,
by God’s mercy,
an everlasting Peace as the final destination.

When I was very young, from what I remember, I used to love to write. Creative writing was a passion in my earliest school years. I remember silly stories about a Monster Party where the partygoers played “Pass the person,” and a Time Machine story where victorious German soldiers (during World War 2) used spears in their battle.

My teachers would encourage me to write at home, as an extra-curricular activity. But I don’t think I ever did.

Although I loved to write at that age (roughly seven years old), I didn’t see it as a viable career choice. I worried about writers’ block. I decided, way back then, that I couldn’t base a career on creativity – because there was no guarantee that the stories and words would come. I couldn’t take creativity for granted – because this was my future livelihood on the line.

I grew up, going through junior school, thoroughly enjoying reading the stories of others – because fiction opened my mind to other worlds, and excited my imagination beyond the ordinary confines of normal life. As time passed, my teenage years saw this reading disappear altogether; and my writing, which was done only for schoolwork, became relatively dull and uninspired. There was so much else that took my attention in those years, and the never-ending slew of futile occupations that consumed my time ensured that my creativity remained subdued – a thing forgotten.

This stage continued into university, until I reached the turning point in my life: a series of events that brought my spirit back to life – woke me up and inspired in me perhaps the greatest change I’ll ever encounter. And from that point on, the introspective side of me began its journey to a path of self-expression – a state of being where I was free to let loose what I held inside, without fearing my innermost thoughts being discovered by prying eyes.

Although this state of being was in the works for some time, it was an online acquaintance that first encouraged me to express myself in writing. And, over time, I began to do that, and the feelings, thoughts, dreams, and fears therapeutically poured out of me into what seemed* like well-crafted poems and pieces that reflected who I was, who I wanted to be, and what was most important to me.

(*I say “seemed” because the words and structures just came across as if they were well thought out. But, in reality, I didn’t plan much at all. I favoured the free-flow method: where I would just write as it came – without giving much thought to stopping, thinking, or editing. Natural was best, in my eyes – because I didn’t want my self-expression to be stifled by the left-brain processes which, I thought, would only hamper what I was writing).

In terms of my career, I had, up till that point, been in an IT position that wasn’t really conducive to interesting writing – because it was pretty much business and technical-related. I then moved into another IT role, but this time one that centred around technical writing and communications. Although this role was, again, business and technical-related, it somehow opened up new doors to me – showing me that I could use my writing skill for my career.

It was also in this period that I began blogging, starting this blog in 2006. My blog began with just photos, because I wasn’t confident enough to post my writings yet. But, over time, I became more comfortable, and introduced written pieces to the blog.

For a long while, this blog served as a great comfort to me: a place where I could post my self-expressions (both visual and written), and get feedback and encouragement from those of you who took the time to visit and comment.

With regard to writing, I also branched out into other forms of writing – applying myself to Islamic-related articles. When I finished the communications job, I ventured into the field of volunteering – doing communications work at two Muslim organisations. I enjoyed this work immensely – because I was getting to do what I loved to do (i.e. write), and apply the skills and knowledge I had learned (i.e. communications) – all in the field that was most important to me: Islam. And, of course, when you work in that kind of organisation, even mundane tasks can earn you Divine rewards – if you do it with the right intention.

I’ve continued to work with one of these organisations up to this year, and I’ve been blessed to be part of some great projects over the last few years. At one point, when they were thinking about appointing a full-time staff member, I considered applying – because I would dearly love to do that kind of work as a full-time career.

Unfortunately, that didn’t work out. And, as I came to see, there aren’t many opportunities for full-time work in that field. At least, not opportunities that pay market-related rates.

It’s a difficult position for Islamic organisations, because they do such great work, and they could probably do so much better – but many of them don’t have the proper support: financially, structurally, and in terms of high-quality professionals that are dedicated to the organisation on a full-time basis.

Many of these organisations struggle to survive; and they just cannot afford to pay the rates that professionals can earn in the corporate or even academic worlds.

So I saw that, if I wanted to work in that field, it would take financial sacrifice. But, being newly-married and newly-financially independent, I didn’t feel it was a sacrifice I could make at that time.

My current job – which I’ve been in for almost two years – makes use of my writing ability, in subjects that are not technical or IT-related (for the most part). Because of this, I enjoy the content of my current work more than any previous jobs.

Yet, I still sometimes find myself frustrated; believing wholeheartedly that I could perform so much better if I were writing about the things that were most important to me. I strongly believe that, if I were given the opportunity to use my abilities for subject matters that resonate strongly within me, I could, insha-Allah, be so much more productive, and hopefully produce work that could be beneficial to those who read / see it (not that my current work is not beneficial…because it hopefully is).

Undoubtedly, one field that this can be achieved in is media – and specifically, Islamic media. However, although I’ve had a few pieces published in printed publications over the last few years, my most recent attempts to break into this field have failed.

So, then, there’s always the Internet. And, of course, blogging – because blogging is really the ultimate personal medium: it’s a platform where you can write about what’s most important to you; hopefully have a positive influence on people; and receive feedback from the readers.

Lately, I’ve been thinking again about my career – wondering if I’ll ever get to do what I love doing as a full-time, decently-paid job. (Note that the financial-sacrifice thing is even less realistic at this point – because I now have a wife and baby to support.)

Not many people get to do what they love as a career. But for those that do – you can see the passion in them, and you can feel the energy that they have in carrying out a ‘job’ which they do out of love – and not just for the money.

Going forward, I wonder what the future holds for me in terms of getting to that career goal. I know I could probably do with some further studies, because:

1. I lack journalistic training (which is actually fine by me, because I don’t want to be a journalist. I’ve heard that it’s a field I would not enjoy).
2. I don’t have formal communications training (despite almost 2 years in a largely communications-based role).
3. Other than my professional training, I haven’t taken any further courses in any kind of writing – be it feature writing, creative writing, or anything else.

Other than that, opportunity is the big issue. Part-time freelancing doesn’t seem like an option right now, because I just don’t have the time for other projects. I don’t even have time to write the things I want to write.

But I do want to try to keep writing – so that that part of me remains active, and hopefully sticks around for the time when, insha-Allah, a proper, full-time opportunity presents itself.

Where that opportunity would come from, I don’t know. I guess the key is to find a way that I can add value to an organisation – an organisation that does the kind of work I want to be involved in; an organisation where I can have the platform to advance their work as well as my own ambitions.

Anyway, like the title of the post says: “Do what you love…love what you do.” That, really, is my ultimate career ambition.

I just wanted to share that here. Any feedback, ideas, or offers would be much appreciated.

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With the 27^th night of Ramadaan completed, and as we approach the day of Eid, there’s sometimes a tendency for us to start ‘winding down’. We think that, because Ramadaan is ending, we can now relax. Of course, the learned among us would tell us that this attitude is erroneous: they remind us that it’s important to make the most of all the days and nights of Ramadaan; even the last few. This is especially true because the 29^th night could still be Laylatul Qadr, and we wouldn’t want to miss out on that night just because of laziness, or an incorrect perception that the 27^th night is definitely the Night.

Ramadaan is bonus time for the Muslim: we can earn immeasurable reward through our fasting and extra worship. These are rewards which we simply cannot gain – consistently – throughout the rest of the year. And, as we come to the end of this blessed period, we should realise that we may never live to see such an opportunity again. So, we should treasure these last few days and nights and strive to gain the forgiveness of our Creator, as well as heightened taqwa – seeing that the whole point of fasting is for us to acquire taqwa.

But, other than that, the whole month, and especially these last few days and nights, are tremendously important for reaping long term benefits.

We often hear advice on carrying the goodness of Ramadaan through to the rest of the year. While that idea sounds good now – when we’re all spiritually enlivened – how do we actually follow through and make the effort to improve ourselves after Ramadaan has passed?

Sure, we can intend to be better after the month, but, without real effort, intention can amount to nothing more than wishful thinking.

There’s a popular adage that goes: “Failing to plan is planning to fail.” While it holds true for many things in life – it certainly doesn’t mean we should micro-plan every aspect of our lives. But, improving our own selves, and our relationship with our Creator, certainly falls into the category of things we should plan for.

And so, just as we may have made plans before Ramadaan began, we should also make plans for after Ramadaan has left us. Two cornerstones of our planning are encompassed in a hadith which tells us that: ‘The most beloved deeds by Allah are those that are consistent, even if they are small.’

The first key point here is consistency: engage in particular acts of worship* on a regular basis. Don’t just do it once, then forget about it until the next big occasion – or until the next time you ‘feel like doing it.’ No. Be regular in doing those deeds –daily, weekly, monthly, at whatever interval suits you – but be consistent in doing it. (*Note that “worship” also includes any good deed done with the right intention).

The second key point is being realistic: ‘…even if they are small’ means that, even if your deed seems insignificant to you – a tiny drop compared to what other people are doing, or almost nothing compared to what you yourself managed to do in Ramadaan – it still counts; it still matters to Allah.

For example, you may really struggle to read Quran, so much so that –outside of Ramadaan – you’re just not motivated to try even once a week. But in Ramadaan, you tried to read a little every day. After Ramadaan, don’t slip back into your old routine. Rather, decide that your small and consistent deed will be that, every single day, you’ll try to read just 2 verses of Quran. Just 2 verses. Not more. Does that seem so demanding on your time or energy?

By following through on such a resolution – with the proper intention and commitment – you can reap amazing benefits. With the help of Allah, recitation will become easier for you, and you can then focus on further aspirations related to the Quran – such as reading with correct tajweed, or memorising more surahs.

Now, while we can see this kind of planning manifested in the actions that we want to pursue after Ramadaan, it’s equally important to apply this principle to our character. In the month of Ramadaan, we have – hopefully – looked inside ourselves and identified personal characteristics which we’d like to work on. Maybe we need to become less selfish; or stop judging others; or beware of pride; or try to break the habit of procrastinating.

These, too, are things which we can plan to work on after Ramadaan. It’s as simple as breaking your list into manageable pieces, then working on one aspect at a time.

For example, maybe you’ve realised that you complain a lot – and you want to break that habit. Set aside one month – an entire month – to remind yourself of this goal, and to try to achieve this goal: in your thinking, in your conversations, in everything. Before you speak, stop to think about what you’re going to say. And, each time you find that you’re about to complain, stop yourself, think about whether this complaint is really necessary, then either swallow your complaint, or voice it in a constructive manner.

Insha-Allah, by the end of that month, you will have improved tremendously in that aspect of your character; and you can work on that for a further month, or move on to another character trait you want to improve.

We can never stop improving, and we can never stop learning. With these precious remaining moments of Ramadaan, we’ve now had about four weeks of self-discipline and better behaviour, and we’re hopefully a lot closer to being the ‘good’ person we want to be.

Now is the time to consolidate the gains of Ramadaan; and make a plan for carrying the benefit through for the next 11 months. And remember, everything starts with intention. So, first make the right intention for doing this. Then, ask Allah to make you successful in this endeavour. Then make your plan. And finally, follow through on it in the coming days, weeks, and months.

May these dying moments of Ramadaan be beneficial to you for the present, and the future.

 Eid mubarak to all

PS: If you want to take this post-Ramadaan challenge to the next level, check out http://www.postramadan.com/.

Do you remember when you were younger? When you were at that age of wonder, where little things would capture your imagination, and you were – at times – greedy for everything you thought would bring you pleasure.

Did you daydream about being in your favourite shop, alone at night – with no one around – and being able to take whatever you want, and not worry about that adult concept of “buying”?

Now, fast forward to the present day – with you all grown up – and answer the following:

If you could have it all; everything you’ve ever wanted; all that your heart desires; all that you dream of; everything you aspire to becoming…EVERYTHING…if there was some way you could attain these things – would you do what you had to, to have your wishes fulfilled?

Do you think it’s possible for any of this to happen?

Or, to you, is it the stuff of fairytales? Are these the wild thoughts of an unrealistic mind that hasn’t grasped the reality of life?

“This isn’t Aladdin,” you may say. “There is no genie. There’s no ‘three wishes’ that are guaranteed to be granted.”

Yes, I realise that. But it doesn’t make my proposition any less unrealistic.

Why?

Because there’s something better than a genie. There’s something better than hours alone in your favourite store. And there’s something even better than every single desire, dream, and aspiration you have.

Who, or what, is this fantastic, unimaginable entity?

Allah: our Creator and Sustainer. The One who brought you – and this whole world – into existence. The One who created every dream and desire you have; Who made you all that you are – and Who still stays with you, closer than your jugular vein.

As we approach the last 10 days of Ramadaan, we know that the night of Laylatul Qadr will be upon us – though we’re never quite sure which night it is. And in that night-better-than-a-thousand-months, we have the ultimate opportunity to have all our dreams, desires, and wishes fulfilled.

How?

Simple. The ‘weapon of the believer’: Dua.

Dua is available to us all year round. But, many times, the rigours of everyday life – the demands on our time and energy – weigh down on us, making us resorted to ‘automated duas’ (the ones we make by habit, often not even remembering what they mean).

But in Ramadaan, and on Laylatul Qadr especially, dua seems so much more powerful – so much more attractive – than usual. We’ll make the effort to exert ourselves in dua; we’ll try our best to be sincere; we’ll open up to our Creator in a way that, perhaps, we haven’t opened up since the previous Laylatul Qadr.

A few years ago, I received beautiful yet simple advice from someone regarding this night: plan for it.

Plan your dua(s). Sit down BEFORE the night; think; let your imagination run loose; and write down everything you want to ask for – whether in this world or in the Hereafter. Then, on that night (or actually, to be safe, on every odd night of the last 10), make your dua. Ask Allah to grant you those things – ask Him to fulfil all your requests.

Remember what Allah says in the Quran? “I answer the prayer of the suppliant when he crieth unto Me.” (Surah 60, verse 186).

What more could you ask for? There are no intermediaries. There’s no priest, rabbi, imam, or mufti you have to go through in order to ask from your Creator. There’s an open, direct line you have to Allah. And it’s absolutely free. All you have to do is make that call. Make your dua.

Obviously, we won’t get everything we ask for exactly as we wish – because we know that duas are answered in one of three ways (i.e. either answered immediately; or Allah prevents an evil from happening to you; or your dua will be answered in the Hereafter). But all duas – provided you don’t ask for anything haraam – are accepted, insha-Allah.

So, if we ask with sincerity, insha-Allah we will get the best of what we ask for – in whatever way Allah chooses to respond to that dua.

So, whether it’s marriage you’re after; or something study or career related; or a way out of your debts; or good health; or world peace; or spiritual and personal growth after Ramadaan; or, or, or….or strengthening your relationship with Allah…whatever you want: make your list, and get ready to make your dua on that all-important night.

The Prophet s.a.w. reportedly said that “dua is the essence of worship”.

At the base of Islam – at the core of everything – is your relationship with your Creator. By communicating with Him – through dua and otherwise – you strengthen that bond. And, as the hadith goes, when you take one step towards Allah, Allah takes ten steps towards you.

Make the most of these precious days of Ramadaan; and prepare yourself for that auspicious night when, insha-Allah, dreams can come true, hearts can be permanently set aright, and you really can have it all.

At this time last year, I wrote my first Ramadaan post. One week into that month, I was scared of missing out on the blessings of the month. My main goal – at that point – was to develop my self-discipline. Up till that point, it hadn’t been a very productive year in terms of personal development. At least, that’s what my perception was.

But looking back, in all those months, the foundations of improvement were being laid. And, even though – soon after Ramadaan ended – my commitment to self-discipline disappeared, things picked up for me in ways I was oblivious to for much of the year.

Ramadaan is the best month of the year for me. It’s the time of year where it’s easier to take stock. The time of year where it’s easier to focus on the things inside that need fixing. The time of year where many of the distractions of life can – largely – be subdued, relegated to a lower priority – while the more important things – those related to my true purpose in life – rise to prominence. This truly is a month of mercy. Because if it weren’t for this blessed month – this amazing, annual opportunity – I don’t know how I would fare in life.

The tone of this month is different – because Muslims share this time communally. I mean: we all experience this month. We all know how special it is. We all know it’s the one time of year where we have to focus on matters which, ordinarily, we can be so easily heedless or careless of.

There’s an atmosphere of peace. There’s increased individual and collective remembrance of our Lord. There’s enhanced service to humanity and goodness to others within our own circle of family and associates. All of these blessings descend upon us in this month, as the doors of Heaven are opened, and the doors of Hell are shut – with the devils being tied up.

Three years ago, I experienced my first Ramadaan ‘alone.’ And I had all these bursts of inspiration. I recorded these ambitions, hoping that they’d carry over into long-term life improvements. But alas, in my time alone, I saw that many of those plans never materialised; despite all the enthusiasm and commitment I felt when I wrote it all down.

At this time two years ago, my life rapidly moved to a new level. I ended that Ramadaan on such a high note – feeling at the height of spirituality. I knew what one of my ultimate goals was for the coming year – and indeed, my entire life to come. And I thought, with the impending changes which I’d dreamed of for so long – my personal dream coming true before my very eyes – that it would be even easier to strive towards that goal. As I came to find out, Allah had other plans for me. My ambitions for that goal, plus everything that was built up in that Ramadaan, seemed to be turned upside down and forgotten in the tumultuous months that followed. But, alhamdullilah, things settled down and progress was made (see the intro, about foundations) – albeit in a very different setting to my life of solitude.

One year ago, I began this month hoping that it would mark a change. I hoped that it would bring me back on track because, as noted above, I felt that the year up to that point was not going well: taking me backwards, rather than forward. Admittedly, last Ramadaan started slowly, but alhamdullilah, it picked up so beautifully. The inspiration returned, and I found myself writing in the vein of previous years – hoping that the words which flowed through me would be of benefit to others, whether the topic was the middle of the month or sustaining the goodness after the month had passed. By the end of that Ramadaan, I again felt a high that only comes after a month of sustained goodness.

And now, here I sit, one week into this Ramadan, and it’s once again been a slow start. But, like last year, I feel the momentum picking up. However, there’s been a monumental change in my circumstances this year: I’m now a father. And although that has occupied a lot of my time and energy, it hasn’t taken away that much from my Ramadaan. This is mostly because I’m not living with my wife and our baby, yet. But on Saturday (insha-Allah), that changes – when they come home. The timing isn’t ideal from a personal perspective – because the last 2 weeks of Ramadaan, and the last 10 days especially – is the time where we need to intensify our efforts; and gather up as much reward as we can, while doing as much as we can to make sure that the goodness we’re taking advantage of this month carries through to the next eleven months. But with this change in life – a ‘personal perspective’ is a luxury. It’s a selfish attitude – because my life must now become one of sacrifice: sacrifice for my family, and what they need, even if it means I won’t feel the spirituality that I crave.

I admire my wife so much for her sacrifice thus far. I know how sad she is to be ‘missing’ out on this month – because a baby is more than a full-time job: you get a break from a full-time job; but with a newborn baby, you don’t really get breaks. I only hope that she attains tremendous rewards for everything she’s doing – even more reward than she would get in a ‘normal’ Ramadaan. Motherhood is really the jihad of a woman; and that’s something that us men will never truly understand. The level of sacrifice a woman must make for her child makes it clear to me why Islam gives such importance to a mother.

Anyway, I wrote this post because I felt I needed to say something about this month. I needed to write while I still had the opportunity – because writing is something so dear to me, and so essential to my inner self. Ramadaan has – for the past few years – been the most inspired time of year for me. With this post, I’ve tried to combine my current thoughts with links from previous years’ posts; and I hope that, if you do read some of those previous posts, you’ll find something beneficial that will help you to make this month the most special of your life. (You can find all my Ramadaan posts here).

All the best for the coming days and nights. Use the time wisely, and remember that, whatever level you are on, this is the ideal month in which to push yourself forward in your spiritual and personal development.

Ramadaan mubarak to you and your family. May Allah strengthen you in your iman and taqwa, and make you of His most beloved servants.

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We didn’t think it would happen so soon. The signs of labour had been absent up to the day before, and it didn’t seem that events would unfold naturally. So, although surprising, that Wednesday evening’s contractions seemed to be just the beginning of what might be a long, drawn-out process. I speak here of the night our daughter was born – two weeks ago, on an amazing night.

Because of complications, we thought the birth would be a planned procedure – booked for the following night. Little did we know that our little bundle of joy (and wind ) was on her way. And she would not wait for the scheduled date.

Rushing to the hospital felt weird, but not too dramatic. Labour can take many hours, and sometimes even a few days – so I thought we were in for a long wait. We planned what we wanted to do in the labour room. We’d packed our bags, prepared everything we needed, and took everything with. On arrival, after the initial consult, it seemed we’d be there the whole night: the stage of labour my wife was in was one that usually takes at least a further 6 hours until she’d get to the major events.

But a visit from the doctor told us otherwise. The baby was not in position for natural birth, and trying to go that route could be dangerous – so we had to take the route that seems so common today: caesarean section. The speed at which everything happened from that point seemed unreal: the doctor’s consultation, news that we had to go with the caesar, and minutes later, we were in theatre.

I still can’t describe the way I felt. It was like a different reality. The kind you experience when you have those moments of clarity: like when you feel the reality of death (another person’s death), or when you experience the true fragility of human life via an accident or a life-threatening crime.

I can’t imagine the pain my wife had to go through, and I dared not look at what was going on – opting instead to try to be as supportive as I could; and hopefully lessening the anxiety.

Before the birth, when we toured the hospital to see the rooms and learn how things were done, I was terrified for my wife. I mean, if you think the dentist is bad, birth is just so much scarier. Maybe it’s just me magnifying the feeling – because I cannot stand pain; and I’d never be able to go through what a woman has to go through when she gives birth. When I had to get a minor boil removed in my teenage years, I wanted to be put to sleep because I didn’t want to feel the pain. I can’t imagine how I’d handle any type of surgery if I ever had to have an operation.

Anyway, as the doctors did their thing, I tried – with my wife – harder than I’ve ever tried, to be of comfort to someone, and take their mind off the experience they were facing. And when our little girl popped out, disgusting as all the fluids and gunk was, it was a huge relief, and a moment of joy that I hope we’ll always remember.

The entity that was just a tiny bean 8 months before (on the ultrasound), was now out in the world, and in the arms of my wife and I. It was awesome to finally meet her; and beautiful to see her little fingers and face. Alhamdullilah, we thank Allah for granting us a healthy baby and not testing us with physical deformations or retardations.

A few months back, I wrote about the anticipation of fatherhood. I wondered whether the spirit of sacrifice would come naturally to me. Now, these first 2 weeks have proven that – so far – it did come. I’ve never been so busy for a prolonged period, running around getting so many things done and not thinking much of myself. I’ve never experienced the consistent lack of sleep on this level – yet still been able to cope in the day (most of the time), and hopefully help enough when I was needed at night.

And I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy.

We’ve got a long road ahead now, and raising a child is probably going to be the most challenging thing my wife and I have ever faced. But we’re grateful to have this opportunity, and we hope that – despite all our faults and shortcomings – our little one will grow up to be a woman of amazing character and righteousness, and a source of goodness not only for us, but for this world as well.

Warning: This article may take a while to read, so if you don’t have time, skip to the end: Act 6.

Act 1: The bar that wasn’t
The other day, I received an email about an alleged bar – being built in New York – which should offend Muslims. The building resembles the Holy Ka’bah (the holiest site in Islam) – in that it’s a big, black cube. The English text of the mail reads:

In the business area of MID TOWN MANHATTAN in New York a new BAR is opened in the name of APPLE MECCA which is familiar to KAABA MAKKA This bar will be used supply of WINE and Drinks. The Muslims of New York are pressurizing Govt of USA to not open this BAR. 

The mail then goes on to show comparative pictures, side by side, of this ‘bar’ and the Ka’bah; along with one final message:

Please do Forward this mail to as many peoples as you can. we need 2 wake up and 2 stand for the dignity of our RELIGION ISLAM!!

Now, obviously, a story like this could be offensive: that someone would imitate the design of such a Holy place, in building a bar.

The problem is, it’s not a true story. Just one Google search revealed that this isn’t actually a bar. It’s supposedly an Apple store (i.e. iPods, Apple computers, etc) – as stated in this article.

Whether the building is still offensive, given that it’s probably just a computer store, is debatable. But the point it, the email contained misinformation – and instruction to spread that misinformation.

I’m glad I didn’t forward that mail.

Act 2: The shoe that insulted us

A few weeks back (some time around April 2009), I received an email about a Nike Air shoe. The way the word “Air” was written – in a calligraphy type script – supposedly looked like the Arabic script of Allah’s name.

This, obviously, was to be taken as an insult to Islam and Muslims: that God’s name was used on the sole and back of a shoe.

If I remember correctly, the email urged the reader to boycott Nike – because of their insult to our religion.

Of course, the email asked the reader to forward the mail to others; to ‘spread the word’ about what this show company had done – so that Muslims all over could take offence over it.

Now, this story did seem to have some substance – but another quick Google search revealed that this incident, and the surrounding protests and apology and PR make-up by Nike, happened about 10 years ago.

While this email contained valid information – albeit with a sensational tone – it was severely outdated. What a fool I would be, had I sent that to others.

I’m glad I didn’t forward that mail.

Act 3: It’s HARAAM!!!

In recent years, many mails have gone around claiming that certain foods we Muslims enjoy here, in South Africa, are actually haraam (forbidden to consume).  For example:

1. The cheese flavourants in Doritos and Cheetos (chips) are a derivative from pork and beef enzymes.
2. Nando’s chicken is Haraam (I think there was a visit paid to the farm they get their chickens from)
3. The following Kellogg’s products contain type gelatin derived from pork sources: Kellogg’s(R) Frosted Mini-Wheats(R) and Kellogg’s(R) Rice Krispies Treats(R) cereals, Krave(TM) Snack Bars.
4. Coca Cola contains alcohol and is haraam.

At the end, the emails ask the reader to forward the mail to others – in the interest of spreading this important information about the products we so willingly consume.

Common sense, as well as further, very basic investigation, into these emails revealed the following:

• The emails in points 1, 2 and 3 are actually true. BUT, they emanate from other countries, where the ingredients/sources are actually Haraam. Here in SA, however, these products are certified Halaal by our Halaal bodies. (Note: The Nando’s one was from the UK – it’s nothing to do with the ongoing Majlis-SANHA chicken wars).
• Point 4 was a huge story a few years back, but the final result – after investigations by the Muslim Judicial Council – is that “all Coca-Cola contains alcohol, but not nearly enough for it to be declared haraam, or prohibited, in terms of Islamic belief.” The actual amount is “equivalent to five sugar granules in a pot of a million and not enough to intoxicate a consumer.”

Act 4: Shock of a lifetime!!!

A few years ago, I received a conspiracy theory mail about September the 11^th. The mail listed various ‘coincidences’ about September the 11^th, such as:

• New York City, Afghanistan, and George W Bush all consist of 11 letters each
• New York is the 11th state
• The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight number 11
• Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11

You get the picture.

So after all of that, according to the mail:

“For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced: for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah and there was peace.”

That verse is number 9.11 of the Quran. unconvinced about all of this Still ..?!”

The mail then concludes by saying: “Send this to as many people as you know and in 11 minutes you will get a nice surprise, if you don’t you will get the shock of Your life in 11 min.”

Now, while the number correlations are interesting, I didn’t read too much into them. Whatever happened, happened. And, whoever was truly responsible will be held to account on the Day of Judgment. We never need to worry about the real truth being revealed, about true justice being served – because on that Day, which we’ll all face, no one will be able to hide what they did; and no one can escape true justice.

The email was outright sensationalist – obviously designed to fuel conspiracies and myths. And you know the red flag which 100% proves it’s source is not to be trusted?

The verse quoted from the Quran.

I have never, ever heard anything like that in the Quran. And anyone – Muslim or not – who takes 2 minutes to find and read a translation of Chapter 9, verse 11, would see that the quote they’ve got in this email is not in the Quran. It’s not even in Chapter 11, verse 9 (if some might claim the numbers are confused).

This kind of thing is just outrageous, and for Muslims to forward such obvious misinformation about the Quran – even if the email has lots of other possibly ‘attractive’ conspiracy qualities – is just a big, big mistake.

I’m glad I didn’t forward that mail.

Act 5: Bits and pieces

To add to the examples already listed, there’s a few others which warrant mentioning in this article.

a.) Microsoft is giving away $1, $3 or $5 to each person that forwards an email.

This kind of email can be about companies, or other ‘good’ causes – like a sick child who needs an operation. The common thread is that all these emails claim that, for every person you forward this email to, money will either come to you, or be donated to the good cause. For example:

“For each person you send this email to, you will be given $5. For every person they give it to, you will be given an additional $3. For every person they send it to you will receive $1.”

The email then asserts how authentic the message is (e.g. “I got a check in the mail for $800. It really works.”), then asks you to forward it.

Unfortunately, some people do believe it and send it on to others. You can see why it’s a scam in this article.

b.) Please help me transfer millions of dollars…I’ll give you 15%

These are called 419 Emails – or Advance-fee fraud. It’s a scam where the reader is persuaded to advance sums of money, in the hope of getting a lot of money in return. Among others, the angle could be related to Nigerian oil companies, Coups in war-torn countries, or just massive sums of inheritance that someone wants you to help them with – using your bank account.

It’s pretty easy to recognise this as a scam, but some have fallen for it, resulting in loss of money, violence, kidnapping, murder, and more. You can read more at Wikipedia.

c.) Beware: anti-Islamic Site

Then there’s warnings about websites which are spreading false information about Islam. These emails give the website address, and ask the reader to forward the email – so that we can spread the message about the misinformation being spread.

The problem is, forwarding these emails is actually counter-productive: it helps those lying websites to get more visitors, and a better listing on search engines.

As Khalid Baig explains in this article, it’s better NOT to forward these emails.

Act 6: Stop, think, think again, then act

As you can see, all of these emails either contain incorrect information, outright lies, or misdirected instructions. Further, most of the mails take on a tone of urgency, and ask the reader to forward it to their contacts.

And if the readers do, it just spreads the faulty message to more and more people.

If you’re still reading this, chances are you’ve received at least one of these kinds of mails before. But my question is: what did you do? Did you believe it? Did you check up on it? Did you forward it? Did you just delete it?

Were you suspicious? Did all the exclamation marks tip you off to the fact that something wasn’t quite right with this mail?

Surah Al-Hujarat (49), verse 6 clearly tells us to verify information when it’s from questionable sources. The verse is talking about an “evil” person who gives us news – but our family member or friend who sent us this email, are they “evil”? Probably not – but most of the time, they aren’t the one who started the email. We never know where these mails originate from – so we can never be sure that it comes from a trustworthy source.

When it comes to this kind of thing, there’s a simple, three step process to handle it:

1. On the first read (or part thereof), if it strikes you as being sensationalist, suspicious, or outright false – either delete it, or do some research (step 2). Even if it’s not suspicious, go to step 2.
2. Check the authenticity of the information. A quick Google (or other search engine) search usually brings up articles, forum posts, or other discussions about the email. The simple way to get information on the exact email you received is to copy a few words from the mail (maybe a full sentence), then paste that in the search engine (with quote marks – so it searches the exact phrase).If you don’t have time to do this, DON’T forward it. Do your research it later, when you have time.And, if you can’t find any matches on the Internet, ask someone who has knowledge about the issue.
3. Now that you’ve done your research, you can respond:
   1. If the email is authentic, and worth being forwarded, then forward it to those you think would appreciate it. But, keep in mind that not everyone will like every email you want to pass on. So, use your discretion: look at the content, and be careful not to send it to people who would be offended or annoyed.
   2. If the email is misinformation, reply to the person who sent it, explaining what’s wrong with the message, and asking them to be careful about this kind of thing in future. Then delete the message – without sending it to anyone else.

Let’s remember that email – and other communication technology – does not take away our duty to be responsible about what we say to others.

Just as we should be careful of what our tongue says, we should also be careful what we say by email (or any other non-verbal form).

And this includes forwarded emails.

Emails contain information. If you can’t stand up for that information – saying you truly believe it and trust it – then don’t send it to others.

So, next time you get a forward, stop before you send it to others; think; think again; then take action.

Now…send this article to everyone you know. Only if you trust it, of course