The Last Time

This could be the last time
I pray out here,
crickets providing the soundscape
which blankets the cool, spring air.

Trees clothed once more,
winter bareness departed.
A season of growth and new beginnings;
the journey has started.

Departure from Home,
a place I’ve held so dear.
yet I know I must leave it;
the time of departure draws near.

Twelve years have I here dwelled,
and 2 more before;
Oh, how I’ll miss this place,
it’s so embedded in my core.

But leave I must,
handing over to another;
new memories for them
in this sanctuary like no other.

The neighbours’ baby wails,
their next generation here.
While my two sit inside,
wiling away childhood moments
on games that capture their hearts.

We were like that, too,
once upon a time –
my brother and I,
so immersed in the screen:
~ Contra (with the cheat codes)
~ Calgames and Test Drive
~ Double Dragon
~ Police Quest
~ Paperboy
Atari then Commodore 64,
before the PC finally arrived.

The simple childhood years
we never knew would end.

But Time ticks on,
and we grew up –
adolescence and new obsessions;
sport a major part,
but music being the only art
we delved into.
Consumed by the beats and clever rhymes;
about destructive and pointless lyrics, never caring,
sounding cool was the thing,
enamoured by the swearing.

It’s all so far away,
in both place and time.
Like I’ve lived forever…
a thousand lifetimes.

Mid-life now my seat,
body aches and thinning hair.
But, soul so much happier –
grown beyond the fear
of childhood insecurities
and emptiness
and pain.
I embrace the journey,
forever moving on this train
of seconds and minutes,
hours and days.
Moments comprising life…a treasure chest…
a mental haze.

And though I’ll leave this home
a few months from now,
it’s merely a prelude
to my final departure
from this world –
for everything must end.

I sit here
writing all this –
prompted by a mere phrase
at the start;
poetry my soul’s shadow;
how it flows from my heart.

This could be the last time
I sit out here
in the back.
But life moves on,
always forward on this track.

One thought on “The Last Time

  1. This is incredibly beautiful. Everything changes has become my mantra the older I get. I love the lines:
    “poetry my soul’s shadow;
    how it flows from my heart.”
    Perfect.

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